Monday, April 11, 2011

I have a confession....

So I am supposed to do my first triathlon in...5 days. April 17th.  Yeah, about that...

Since this is my first tri, and I'm not totally sure what to expect or anything, I don't yet own a wetsuit.  While it is my understanding that a wetsuit is always optional, for this swim the water is an estimated 54*, so I'm thinking I should wear one.  A local running/tri shop rents wetsuits and I've been meaning to go in a get mine reserved for weeks, but I just haven't yet.  Now that we are down to the last week I'm afraid I'll go in and ask, and they will be out.

See, while I'm worried about that occurrence, I'm also a little relieved at the possibility.  Then I'd be off the hook.  Because I'm scared.  Ok, maybe scared isn't quite the right word, but I am nervous/anxious/uneasy/fearful/apprehensive/concerned/or whatever other adjective you can think of.  In the past 2 weeks I have become filled with doubt over the task I have taken on, and my ability to do it.  I think this is why my workouts have been slipping, and I haven't been doing what I need to be doing.  Its a self-fulfilling prophecy in my inability to make it to the start line of any race.  So I'm admitting that I may have self-sabotage a little bit.

And as of tomorrow (because I've been up since 2:45AM today, and workouts just aren't going to happen, honest) I'm back on the training wagon.  I've got 3 months to my HIM, and I can't risk going to that start-line under-prepared.  My lack of knowledge/experience will put my at a big enough disadvantage as it is.

So there is is, a day early for True Confessions Tuesday, but that's my confession.  I'll update when I know more.


Brooke said...

stop it.


you're kick ass awesome. don't forget it.

i did a sprint tri and you can swim/bike/run circles around me. trust me you need a wet suit for 54* i did a swim in 70* water and thought i was going to get hypothermia.

don't make me fly out there and kick you in the rear.

Kirsten said...

Make that call. Get that wetsuit. You'll feel so much better with one official tri under your belt before the HIM. Don't make me kick your ass in May. 'Cuz I will, especially now that I know you don't tower over me. :)

Bari said...

You MUST get that wetsuit and get thee to the starting line, because once you are there you are going to be freaking AWESOME!