So I am supposed to do my first triathlon in...5 days. April 17th. Yeah, about that...
Since this is my first tri, and I'm not totally sure what to expect or anything, I don't yet own a wetsuit. While it is my understanding that a wetsuit is always optional, for this swim the water is an estimated 54*, so I'm thinking I should wear one. A local running/tri shop rents wetsuits and I've been meaning to go in a get mine reserved for weeks, but I just haven't yet. Now that we are down to the last week I'm afraid I'll go in and ask, and they will be out.
See, while I'm worried about that occurrence, I'm also a little relieved at the possibility. Then I'd be off the hook. Because I'm scared. Ok, maybe scared isn't quite the right word, but I am nervous/anxious/uneasy/fearful/apprehensive/concerned/or whatever other adjective you can think of. In the past 2 weeks I have become filled with doubt over the task I have taken on, and my ability to do it. I think this is why my workouts have been slipping, and I haven't been doing what I need to be doing. Its a self-fulfilling prophecy in my inability to make it to the start line of any race. So I'm admitting that I may have self-sabotage a little bit.
And as of tomorrow (because I've been up since 2:45AM today, and workouts just aren't going to happen, honest) I'm back on the training wagon. I've got 3 months to my HIM, and I can't risk going to that start-line under-prepared. My lack of knowledge/experience will put my at a big enough disadvantage as it is.
So there is is, a day early for True Confessions Tuesday, but that's my confession. I'll update when I know more.